Sitting in the Silence…

As most of you already know, we have bought our own little slice of heaven and have moved. We have been in the new house for a week today. It is beautiful, peaceful and inspiring. I have been woken up by roosters this week, been scared half to death coming face to face with a moose out my bedroom window, have watched horses feed as I drink my morning matcha. I have had my new neighbors bring me fresh farm eggs, and homemade cookies (didn’t have the heart to tell them we are allergic). This has been a pretty drastic life change for us as a family, one we have dreamed of and worked towards the past few years. For us it brings the freedom to grow our food, raise chickens… and yes possibly even adding a few sheep or goats to the family to assist in the mowing of our vast lawn.

This new adventure has been exciting, terrifying, and has taken me in particular completely out of my “comfort” zone. We made the decision to not have cable or satellite. To be far enough from shops that I can’t just make a quick jaunt in for a coffee or a pack of diapers… okay, really we are only 7 minutes from town… but to me it feels like we have moved to the boon docks… ha ha. It is forcing me to be quiet and be okay without the luxuries and conveniences of town.

The downfall with being quiet is that you must listen to your own thoughts and feelings. You must face the fears that you have suppressed for so long through chaos. Well, I have still had a fair amount of chaos with the move, my fear of the dark, and helping my kids adjust to the MAJOR changes in our life and all this with a husband 1000 km’s away. This has been an insanely challenging month, which for the most part I took in stride with only one major crash… and that was I. Thank goodness for supportive family and friends who jumped in to help when that happened.

I have so many thoughts and visions for what this change will bring, for what our property and home will allow us to do for other families going through the same health struggles we face. I have had so many quiet moments to see what I want the property to do.

Everything in the last month happened so synchronistically that one couldn’t help but feel possibly it was all meant to be. When we first saw the property it was almost as if someone had taken everything we had every thought we might want put a bow on it! It all happened so perfectly and quickly that as I sit here writing this it feels as if I am in a dream and am going to wake up and realize that it is still outside my hands grasp. The house has inspired so many creative juices to start bubbling in me.

The changes we have gone through this past month have inspired me to look at my own health. Moms, to often we forget about us. We are naturally wired to put all others first and hence forget that if we aren’t healthy the whole system crumbles. We are the glue that holds the family together and need to honor ourselves now more than ever!

So for today, I choose to sit in my silence, enjoy every new moments experience. Face my fears and inhibitions. Focus on my whole health… Mind, body, and spirit. To be a little selfish and make the changes necessary to be whole, to feel truly balanced internally and externally. My hope today is that my journey inspires you to remember you in all the chaos of being mother, friend, wife, and daughter.

Our children and husbands will truly be inspired by our authenticity and in such will be leading by example. Together we can walk the walk. For no one has the ability to change lives through example as through a mother! For the smallest changes make the biggest difference.

The real religion of the world comes from women much more than from men - from mothers most of all, who carry the key of our souls in their bosoms. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

One lamp - thy mother's love - amid the stars
Shall lift its pure flame changeless, and before
The throne of God, burn through eternity -
Holy - as it was lit and lent thee here.
~Nathaniel Parker Willis

Happy Mothers Day!

Sending all of you beautiful ladies so much love. Thank you for inspiring me, for letting me walk with you through the amazing journey of Motherhood!

Happy Mothers Day

I sit here today, staring quietly out the window of my dining room looking at the beautiful sun shining, the snow on the ground with the green grass peaking through; exhausted as my kids have been through Pneumonia, the flu, asthma attacks, eczema flare-up in the past month and feel as though I could run away for a day... okay lets be honest... a weekend. I sit here feeling sorry for myself thinking, I should call my husband home so that I can walk away for a few hours! What is it in a mother that keeps us going even though we sometimes feel like we can’t handle even doing another load of laundry....

I received a phone call yesterday that put it all back into perspective. I have only spoken to this woman once before and it was regarding child care so I had no prior relationship with her. Somehow we got on to the topic of Modish Monkeys and what we do. That led us to her explaining her Childs health issues with me. Wow, let’s just say I am so blessed to have health, developing children! She spoke with such peace and acceptance, her son is 24 and suffers from a genetic disease which includes cleft palate, heart problems, sensitivities, and a multitude of other health issues. He is highly functioning for what he has and is at about the developing levels of a 12 year old. Please forgive me if I missed anything or have any of this wrong. I was just so touched by her story. For those of us with children with allergies, asthma, and eczema, it is so hard to forget how lucky we are. Our children’s issues can be controlled through food, supplements, vitamins, minerals, and the occasional required dose of medicine for emergency situations. Our children could possibly live with the threat of food being the end of them for the rest of their lives, is it a hindrance or blessing for bring their families to an awareness of the foods around them. Please note I am not minimizing our struggle but I am hopefully shedding some light on the fact that it could be so much worse! Sometimes I have a hard time keeping that in perspective.

You all know how the everyday battles with our Allergic children affect me, was in my last blog. Today I want to celebrate the fact that you have beautiful, healthy children, who just need a little more care than the average child. Really is there an average child or is that just a child where the parents aren’t open or even aware of possible issues they may face. Let’s celebrate the fact that these awesome kids are going to make a difference in life, Moms you are warriors raising these children to be all they can be, open and accepting of others because of their challenges. Moms celebrate the fact that your little ones can make a change and be the change, they may be small but they can still do big things!

I thank God that I have two healthy, sensitive children who have changed my life forever, and made me a better person for it. I thank them for choosing me to give them and other kids going through this struggle a voice. I thank them for loving me unconditionally, and forgiving me when I slip up. I thank them for accepting me even when dinner sucks, we are digging clean clothes out of laundry baskets, and I didn’t get their favourite cereal at the grocery store. I thank them for seeing the best in me even when I don’t think I am worthy of it. I thank them for needing me when they are sick, for opening my heart to love in ways I didn’t know was possible. I thank them for being!

So for those of you reading this who don’t have children or they are grown please know from one mothers perspective, it is not me we need to celebrate it is the relationship of a mother and her children. For the love of a mother and child could move mountains, can cross boundaries, can be felt even when you are not standing next to them. There is no love like the love of a mother and child. So this mothers day I don’t want to celebrate me, I want to celebrate the love that created my children, the love that is my children and the peace in knowing that I am great just the way I am.

Moms please know you are loved! Take a moment on Mothers Day to look into your children’s eyes and truly see the love they have for you, you are worthy of every single bit of it and celebrate that, the love of a mother and child!

Happy Mothers day! I celebrate you for having the courage to look for what is best for your child, for having the strength to fight for them, and for learning in the process to truly love you. I celebrate you, the love in being a mom.

Next week we will be discussing the diet changes I am making in our house!

A mom’s perspective on the battle with Allergies and Eczema

I am so thankful everyday for my kids and what they have brought to my life. I am so blessed that my children chose me as their mother and that I have a husband who picks up where I fall. Together we would move mountains, quite literally to make sure our children have the best life that they can. Like any parent! I look at my little guy and think he has no idea that he has some health obstacles that other children do not face, however I know he suffers tremendously at times. My sole mission in life other than to help guide my children through the puzzle of life is to help other parents dealing with the same issues which we face! One would think that we would 100% have his conditions cleared up and are just sailing through the maze of allergies. Well for the most part we do, until his allergies decide to change or his body decides to add another sensitivity into the mix.

After I posted the last blog, my son broke out in eczema which is covering about 70% of his little body in sores and scab, his eyes are swollen, and he has a horrible dry cough at night... For some reason this just knocks me down and brings everything back into perspective, it makes me a mom again. There is nothing more painful than watching your child suffer and struggle to figure out what caused it! The week before that he ended up in the ER with an asthma attack.... he has never battled with this reaction! This blog may seem all over the place this week but I am just going to write too you moms who I know understand my situation and how daunting it can feel.... because I am right back in the middle of it again.

For the past 8 months my son had been completely clear of ALL reactions, I had it all figured out and knew what to avoid in his diet and triggers. Life has thrown us a curve ball! I just wish it was me that could take his reactions for him... Someone reminded me this week that obstacles are brought as lessons, as I like to say there is always a silver lining.... Let’s find that!

My niece was born with a cleft palate without the hair lip and went unnoticed until she was over 6 months old; she wasn’t gaining weight and cried all the time... So painful for them when she was FINALLY diagnosed and had to have reconstructive surgery on the roof of her mouth prior to her first birthday, and continually has to have tubes put in her ears as well (she is know 8). I am telling you this because my brother saw my little mans eczema when he was about a year old (wasn’t the worst his condition got to) for the first time and was devastated! He made a comment about how painful it is for him to see him like that... He told me my nieces condition was surgically fixed my sons could not be, that this maybe something he deals with for the rest of his life... that was a big breaking point for me. To hear someone else put into words how I felt every time I looked at him scratching and crying as a baby... it hurt beyond words! Why does he have to go through this I always wondered! Why my son....

One of the worst days of my life was just prior to my son’s second birthday, I was due with our 2nd child in 2 weeks and had watched my son cry and scratch for 2 days straight. He wouldn’t eat, barely drank anything, and was suffering beyond words! He had black circles under his eyes, he had constant open sores on very red swollen big toe that wouldn’t heal, and his body was COVERED in eczema (open sores) from his cheeks to his toes... I didn’t know what to do, but knew that I had to do something, anything! I booked him in with a Holistic dietician I found through our local health food store, she had him in within a day and within a week of following her recommendations his condition had improved by about 90%. That was the turning point for his condition and our awareness! Always remember you are the only advocate your child has, trust your gut! I have always been very luck with my husband as he has always been very supportive of whatever I want to try with regards to our children’s health. Although it still has wreaked havoc on our relationship, there is nothing worse for a parent than watching your child struggle with any health condition. It is painful for all involved! This is especially painful for men as they need to fix problems and there when there is NOTHING they can do to make it better now.... It eats them up!

When dealing with our son, we have always tried to brush his allergies off as a very casual thing so that he doesn’t feel different from other children! I want him to grow up with a strong sense of self and confidence. He now knows when something makes him feel off or not right, he knows that he can’t tolerate wheat, sugar, most skin products; he knows that these things make him feel yucky. He tells me when he needs his milk thistle and cherry juice or his zango juice. I trust what he is telling me when he brings me these things, that his body needs this to keep him balanced. Your children are more in tune with how they feel and what they need than you are, remember to honour them and listen... they may be a small little being, but they are still a person who needs nurturing.

When my son has a reaction like he is going through right now, he get mischievous, and aggressive, he name calls, and doesn’t act himself; can you blame him! If you have ever had hives, think of how you just wanted to jump out of your skin, now add on top of that stomach upset, as it usually affects their intestinal tract, their livers, and thus the intestinal tract causing neurological reactions. Now how would you react!!! I know I would feel the exact same way. I would want someone to just hold me and tell me it is all going to be okay, WE are going to get through this TOGETHER. That we have an understanding as moms that we are suffering as well watching these little beings whom our only job is to protect them go through something which is so excruciating. Please be kind to yourself; understand that you are suffering as well and accept that, it is okay... they are an extension of you!
With the past few weeks being such a struggle the one thing that I have pulled out of it is a guideline for what happens when a reaction of any kind happens;

1) Love them and be accepting of their actions and condition

2) Treat the sypmtoms – get the itching down or slow inflammation in the chest by using whatever you have to to stop it from getting worse!

3) STAY CALM, KEEP THEM CALM (I use Nervoheel on him and I, available at local health food stores)

4) Treat the lingering effects – the rash, etc

5) Keep them calm throughout the day, play quiet games, listen to music, honour them if they just want to veg out in front of a movie, etc ~ within reason of course... ha ha)

6) Let them heal, physically and emotionally

7) Look back through your journals, try to figure out what changed in their routines or diet
a. Make a list of all the changes
b. Eliminate anything you think may have been the trigger for a minimum of 6 weeks
c. Book an appointment with your Naturopath or therapist

8) Nurse the underlying health links, the intestinal tract, liver, etc

9) Love them and be accepting of their actions (yes I am repeating this)

10) Love you and take the time to cry.... it sucks more than people or you may even realize! Take the time to step away even for 10 minutes to react to what is going on, process it and move on to make the changes necessary for your little people.

11) Please remember not to identify your child as the illness they have but identify them as the beautiful person they are!

The thing I am taking from our episode the past two weeks is that we are all human, that we are constantly evolving. That we need to take the tender moments to love ourselves as mothers and fall apart when we need to. I am so blessed to have some AMAZING women in my life, who don’t pick me up when I have fallen down but stand next to me while I find the strength to pick myself up! They are my shoulder to cry on, and the ear to listen for me to heal myself from the pain my child is suffering through and to be the strength for my family to get through this one, and educate ourselves further to avoid another flare-up. My pillars of strength support me and accept me for who I am, their being in my life gives me the love that I need to pass on to my children and husband when I have none left to give. They are the reason that I am able to function through this crappy situation, the crap it can cause on your marriage and push through to the point where I even have enough strength to and passion to hopefully help you be the strongest best mother and wife you can be.

My son is blessed with wonderful little friends who accept him for who he is and love him scabs and all. They have never once asked why his legs are covered in sores, why he wears glasses or why he can’t eat the things they can eat... at 3 ½ when they are all noticing the differences in each other! My son has an amazing ability to accept people for who they are and not notice the physical differences in others. That is a gift that I wish all could have, not judging the book by its cover but recognizing integrity!

The silver lining in having a child with health issues is it opens your eyes to the fact that there are so many of us that deal with these and different circumstance, that the Modern Child is just this but sensitive being that need to be nurtured. What is the stat for a healthy, typical developing child.... well someone recently told me, ZERO! Moms NOW is your time to shine, you have the strength within you to be the advocate for your Childs health, to nurture your little ones, your partner and yourself! Be the voice these children need and don’t just settle for rub this on your little ones skin and the rash will go away, or use the ventalin 4 times a day, or let’s hope they grow out of it. You are the only one who can bring your child back to the roots of pure health.... Please listen to them, as small as they maybe... they will give you the signs to know what they need. Please please please, allow yourselves to feel angry, hurt, and sad when you are alone... this will take you another step closer to helping your child find peace with their health and acceptance of what needs to be done, and open your eyes to what they need to get healthy and function at their highest potential.

I am here to be a pillar of strength for you, not to help you up but to stand next to and help you find the strength within you to help your children and your partner.

My name is Renee, I am a mother of a child with multiple food sensitivities, environmental triggers, and eczema, and I would like to support you in your role as a mom of a Modish Monkey (Today’s Modern Child)!

Thank you to my Pillars of Strength!

New Year, New Beginnings

HAPPY NEW YEAR

Well I haven't been as good as I would have liked with keeping on the website and blog. I will blame it on the holidays and have 2 kids 2 and under! lol.

I am happy to report first that our son's eczema has been pretty much clear since we switched his diet and put him on the supplements (probiotic, milk thistle, alcabase, etc) and eliminated all Dairy and Wheat! It is amazing the results not only to his skin but also to his overall personality! He is so much less stressed and overall just always happy. His skin is clear 95% of the time, and the only reactions we see is on the tops of his hands and the odd time behind his knees. We have had NO open sores or bumps at all. It has been such a change!

Our little girl is not currently showing any signs of Eczema, our fingers are crossed that she doesn't also react to the wheat when we start introducing solids. She is however lactose intolerant, I have had to avoid Dairy while I have been feeding her. I have been drinking lactose free milk and cheese as does my son and this seems to work just fine for us.

On the website front, Laara (she is mentioned on the Links page of our website) will be putting up an article regarding Eczema, Asthma, and Allergies in the next few days. This article will open your eyes to how easy it can be to just change your lifestyle in hopes of eliminating these common reactions. If you would like more information please contact Laara directly at laara@vita-quest.com.

On the store front, We are in the process of launching a modish monkeys line of products as well as a daily diary. Please watch for these wonderful new products due out Spring 2009.

Here is to another year of bringing awareness to Eczema, Asthma, and allergies.

Everyone has a story, everyone needs advise on occasion, everyone needs a place to share, laugh, and cry. We hope that you will feel comfortable in letting our website be that place of support

MODISH MONKEYS IS FINALLY LAUNCHED

We finally were able to launch the site today! We truly hope you enjoy it and please feel free to post or email us your feedback... renee@modishmonkeys.com. Please feel free as well to start your own topics on this blog regarding eczema, asthma, and allergies.

Again Welcome to Modish Monkeys!

Renee